who is having a human experience?
Vic Shayne
author
13 Pillars of Enlightenment: How to realize your true nature and end suffering
A friend recently returned from a retreat and said that she is a spiritual being having a human experience. And I have heard others say they are consciousness having a human experience and similar things. Is this true? How can you find out for yourself, or do we just tend to believe what we are told, especially if the words are coming from an esteemed spiritual teacher? Taking other people’s word for what we are is living a secondhand life. So what can we truly know for ourselves? How can you know what you are instead of accepting someone else’s truth about what you are?
the self is conditioned out of thoughts
The egoic self, which is the sense of a “me,” results from psychological conditioning of the brain so that the idea of a center forms. This center, which is what each of us calls “me,” believes it is a separate entity from all that exists. It has developed the “me versus you,” “me versus the other,” duality. Thus, it has fragmented itself into the observer and the observed: There is I who sees and that which I see. The subject and object. With this perspective we go about our business objectifying everything in a world of our own making.
When someone says that she is having a human experience, it is an example of this fragmented perspective: The “I” relating to an object, which is the human experience. But aren’t we actually whole? After all, the same people who claim to be spiritual teachers also tell us that we are all one. Well, this cannot be true if we are also separated from our experiences. How do I know this? It comes from years and years of observing my self, thoughts, ideas, memories, and what I tend to think about — all because I wanted to know what I was and what life was really about, and why people can be so mean and why there is so much suffering in this world, both personally and universally. No one had to tell me that there is suffering, and no one was going to tell me what I was. I had to find out for myself. A spiritual teacher who does not guide you back to yourself is of no use. Interesting ideas and the repetition of spiritual tropes is not going to help you know yourself.
the dreamer is the dream, in and out of the dream
In one specific dream years ago, I became lucid to the point of realizing that I was in the midst of a dream as the dreamer and everything that I was dreaming; I became aware that I was the creator of all of it, as well as the central actor playing the role of a self having an experience. In reality, I was all characters and the scenario and emotions. It was all inside me, the dreamer. It was in my head, if you will: an entire dream world that seemed so real. When I woke up from sleep the realization did not come to an end. In fact, it continued without interruption and I had realized that in the waking state I was still the totality of all that is, the seer and the seen, the observer and the observed, the experiencer and the experience. I am dreaming this thing that we collectively call reality. But this “I” is not the “I” of the egoic self; rather, it is the “I” of consciousness. Thus, I realized that consciousness is experiencing itself in, and from, the vantage point of all of its expressions. Each of us, as consciousness, is dreaming reality, but instead of realizing this we unwittingly believe we are the actor in the dream, and like any committed actor we forget who we really are.
is there a way to escape the self?
It is difficult to pull oneself out of this illusion of being separated from all else. People can do it intellectually, as an idea, but to actually see it this way usually takes a lot of observation without the overlay of the egoic self. The realization does not come from thinking, because thought, which is always of the past, is what created the fragmented subject/object illusion in the first place. It is through silence, which is the now, that this becomes obvious; a realization of crystal clarity. Therefore, no one can do this for you, you must do it for yourself. No one can implant complete silence in your own brain; you must find a personal clarity within your own perspective.
pronouns can be misleading and perpetuate the illusion
We are accustomed to using the words “I,” “me,” “you,” “we,” and other pronouns. These are helpful in our communications, dealings, and relationships, but they seem to further cement our perceived separation. So much is written today of nonduality that it has little meaning, but consider that there really is no you versus me or him. The you-versus-me is duality, and so is “you” the observer and that which you observe: the subject and the object. Neither actually exists in a psychological sense.
Physically speaking we can say that there is a separation between objects and expressions, and that’s how we are able to experience a life. So, yes, she is over there and you are over here. You are right here, but your car is out there. But what we observe as the contents of consciousness is not ours alone, the contents are universal — anger jealousy, greed, fear, pleasure, suffering, etc., all of which make up the human experience. Each self is this compilation created by generational psychological conditioning.
what is it that you want?
It is best to reiterate a couple of main points that arise out of my articles: First, there’s nothing wrong with using pronouns; they are necessary for the sake of communications. But if you want to find the source of suffering then you need to see how the self separates itself from its own emotions, thoughts, memories, agendas, and so on. Second, trying to make your life happier, calmer, and simpler can make for a wonderful experience, but such things have nothing to do with finding what you are beneath the egoic self, the body, and even consciousness. And lastly, my words come from my own enquiry into what I am; they are not the teachings of anyone else. There is no way to know what you truly are by using a belief-filled mind to see what is beyond thought.
