falling into the spiritual trap of being a follower
Vic Shayne
author
13 Pillars of Enlightenment: How to realize your true nature and end suffering
The first question we must ask ourselves is what do we truly want out of spirituality. If the answer is that we want to know what we truly are beyond this shell of a sense of self, an image of what we have been led to believe we are, then the next question is to ask, “Who am I?” But asking this second question is without meaning or import unless we find out what we want. And if we can keep this desire close to our hearts then we are less likely to fall into the spiritual trap of becoming a follower.
who knows what they want?
Most people do not want to know what they are at their core; they just want to be a follower. Look around and you will see that this has been true since the beginnning of human history. There is a long list of teachers, gurus, awakened beings, false prophets, cult leaders, and psychics who have offered a special message to soothe the suffering souls. of their followers. Many have been called saviors, plain and simple, promising to save their followers from the sorrows and misfortunes of life.
the eternal search for enlightenment
The search for enlightenment is age-old. Ancient Indian and Chinese spiritual teachings are proof of this. But the paradox of enlightenment is that teachings will never culminate in enlightenment. This was the experience of Siddhartha Gautama, the man who became the Buddha. After intense memorization and study of the ancient Vedas, as well as trying all sorts of meditation, acts of humility, and sitting at the feet of the best gurus, Siddhartha at long last realized that all such things could not break the barrier of the sense of self, the ego, that was the obstacle between his desire and enlightenment. Being a follower, Siddharta discovered, was not the answer. It was only when he let go of the sense of self and all of its temptations and identities did he discover something incredible: enlightenment is not something that can be attained, because it is ever-present, waiting to be realized. Ironically, Siddhartha himself became the ultimate guru and, like Jesus, his legend and teachings have produced billions of followers over the millennia. And so the cycle continues.
For those who earnestly, whole-heartedly desire to be awakened, the spiritual trap of becoming a follower awaits at every turn. Each generation produces more spiritual teachers, but how many people sit at their feet, literally and figuratively, hoping to awaken vicariously through them? There are even long-standing tropes that a spiritual master can awaken his follower merely by being in his physical proximity or on the receiving end of a gaze. This can never happen, because to be awake means to see existence in a certain way, the same way one may be in awe of a flower or be moved by a certain piece of art. No one, not even an enlightened guru, can do this on one’s behalf. No one can have an “Aha!” moment for you.
see for yourself ‘what is’
The simple reason why being a spiritual follower will never lead to one’s own awakening is that one must do the work, see for oneself, suffer, think deeply, be driven above all else to find out what she is at her core, and have something occur in the brain and mind that stuns them into silence to realize “what is.” This cannot occur merely by listening to lectures, reading books, studying scriptures, using effort to silence the mind, praying, or singing mantras, because all of these and more are generated from the same self that one is attempting to diminish.
security at all costs
The egoic mind, which is the sense of a self, learns from the earliest age to protect itself at all costs — to preserve and perpetuate itself. It learns what it is from the beliefs and teachins of others, and, guided by authority figures, adopts a religion, nationality, social status, and all other sorts of identities. The identities and associations become so encrusted that the sense of self is hardened and falsely believes it is the center of importance and thereby prioritizes its own security above all else. The self believes that security can be ensured by an outside force, such as a New Age teacher, a cult leader, or a religion or club, then this may be all that is needed to go through life and be protected against the ills and arrows of life.
The leader and his teaching become as much of a diversion from taking a serious look at one’s self as an other distraction, such as drugs, sex, television, video games, gambling, football, alcohol, work, sports, and you name it. This is how most people live their lives — distracted from the realities of the world while participating in the world with all the focus “out there” instead of “in here” at the source. Still, the true spiritual seeker has an inkling that this is a problematic way to go through life, so she searches for greater meaning even as she falls into the trap of becoming a spiritual follower with the promise that his teachings must be the way to enlightenment. With any luck the trap will be a temporary one. Mine was 12 years. And then the seeker will brush herself off and seek some more.
the seeking leads back to the self
But, alas, there is no way to enlightenment; there is no path or “how-to.” There is only negation: When one lets go of all ideas, thoughts, memories, desires, needs, attachments, identities, teachings, beliefs, and the rest of that which makes up the sense of self, what becomes obvious is a silent stillness out of which everything arises: the nothingness that yields everythingness. And where is this nothingness? It is right here where you are now; it is in the heart of the seeker, and thus the seeking leads back to the seeker.
What, then, can you get from a spiritual teacher? IF the spiritual leader is not a self-serving egomaniac or someone deluded into thinking he is an enlightened master, perhaps there is something to learn, but the value is not in his description of what it means to be awake. A person who is truly awake will offer one prescription: Find out who you believe you are be done with it. Drop the egoic self because it alone is the obstacle to being awake. The seeker is the obstacle, because the seeker has separated herself from that which is sought. When this becomes crystal clear then there is only the “what is” and the seeker has dissolved into unalloyed awareness.
All the talk about manifestation, being a better person, learning to have gratitude, practicing awareness, believing we are all one, and learning how to force the mind to be quiet have nothing to do with being awake. These may serve some purpose to help you be happier and to reduce your stress levels, but they have nothing to do with being awake.
So let’s revisit this question: What do you want in the spiritual sense? If it is to find a teacher and sit at his feet to soak in his words and countenance and to feel more secure and special, then the next question is not for you. And this question is: “Who am I?” Ask yourself how you can be who you are, not a follower, not a learner, not a student, not an acolyte, and not a seeker. See what is here that has always been here at the core of what you really are.
